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The 2005 Edition of The Bill Andrews Electronic Fish Wrapper - A Day With BA - Is Still Going?

Contents / Site Map        LJ's Classic Characters Starting with Butch, MacMeda and assorted Hostile Locals  

    Entries for December 2005    -    Previous Entries   -    Sand In / Sand Out

Updates and Revisions for this month:   Just in:

BA spews fire ring crapola, err, offers a fire side chat, err, will attempt NOT to offend anyone - Coming soon to a fire ring nowhere close to you!
More Hostile Locals - 22 Jan 2006
More Tommy  Wolfe  is a dork Reef - 22 Jan 2006
More Arena Surfing - 22 Jan 2006
Killer Whale Sighting 22 Jan 2006????
More Shores photos -14 Jan 2006

- 31 Jan 2006 -
Everybody - well not quite everybody - loves to come to The Arena to watch the sunset -

I guess there is something cathartic / spiritual about the symbolism of day's end, but personally, I like to think of an Arena Sunset as a time to demonstrate my sensitive side to anyone who is foolish enough to think I really care about anything other than my own happiness.


Once in a while there are some incredible acts [that pale even mine] of selfishness right before a sunset in The Arena.

Even though I was painfully, and slowly, recovering from the pleasure of my annual trip to Dr. Urology I managed to find a bit of humor in this:

Part One: Guy parks properly - obeying RED no parking curb - he's got the perfect spot to sit in his car and watch the sunset.

Part Two: Right before sunset - babe parks right in front of Proper Guy -

Part Three: Babe completely ignores red curb and totally blocks Proper Guy's view of sunset -
Anyway, this is what we, in The Penalty Box, and the Me Babe, saw:

Too bad Proper Guy missed it - another example of a nice guy finishing last?

[Disclaimer - I don't know who the "babe" is - she's probably the girlfriend or wife or ... of some guy who's gonna kick my a** for making a joke about this - I'm really sorry if I offended you, babe]

Oh, I almost forgot in all the excitement -

- as always, the locals were hostile!

- 30 Jan 2006 -


- 29 Jan 2006 -

Another Crappy Sunrise!

Another Hostile Local surfing another crappy wave in the always polluted water!

Another day of disappointing surf in The Arena

The LEAST Hostile of all of the Hostile Locals!

Another Lousy Sunset!


- 28 Jan 2006 -

Campus Point Sunrise - 28 Jan 2006 -

More beachfront schlock, err, shock and awe!

Well, I guess it's time for me to ruminate on days long gone about fire ring words of wisdom - but that's gotta be later!

Shucks, it has to be the remarkable beachfront birth I witnessed yesterday!

I've seen the birth of puppies, kittens, birds, fish, my own kids, and even the birth of the wretched Harbor Seals - but I had NEVER, EVER, witnessed the birth of the rare Duncan Seal:

Duncan Seal - emerging from the womb of his sandy eggo

The Duncan Seal is unique in the animal world - it's a mammal, born fully grown and ready to eat live game -

I've been attempting to document the birth of a DS, and I've spent thousands of hours searching for it - no not EST - the birth of a DS - I finally found it - right in front of my nose!
The local Duncan Seal hunters showed me the Seal Attractant
Guaranteed to attract seals and seal thrill seekers
I almost stepped-on the Duncan's head
Some seal people aided the birth
The Duncan Seal finally emerged from his sandy birth place
He saw some game
The chase ensued
Duncan's first meal!
Oh yeah - the sunrise, the sunset, the surf - all sucked today - go home - stay home!

Nowhere near Campus Point Sunset - 28 Jan 2006 -


- 26 Jan 2006 -

- Giant Squid Invade The Arena -
Non-Indigenous Surfers Are Warned to Stay Out of the Water

I should have known - it's THAT time of year again!

A couple of days ago, I caught a quick glimpse of the first Giant Humboldt Squid of the season.

It appeared that the squid was a baby, and luckily for us, a large California Condor swooped down on the squid, killed and devoured it [the squid]

This is not an omen to be taken La Jolla Lightly [you gonna this exclusive as one of your own, too]


I figgered that yesterday the squid would be more plentiful, and that the big daddies might be coming in to pull unsuspecting surfers off their boards - snack time in The Arena -

I called John Slavin and told him that if he [Slavin] were lucky, and if he did not become squid bait, he might get THE photo of a lifetime - The Rare Giagantor Bird from Utah, Vs The Giant Squid from hell.

Here's a graphic photo of the epic battle: Giagantor  Vs Squidilla

- AND -

As always, the surf sucked, the water was polluted, the locals were hostile, and the sunset was fog bound!


25 Jan 2006

"Morituri te salutant" - illustrated and 'splained??

24 Jan 2006

Leandro in The Arena

Ballin' The Arena

Sunset - From MTV Antenna Hill far above Bird Rock, La Jolla, CA

Coming soon:

Morituri te salutant - illustrated and explained!


23 Jan 2006

22 Jan 2006

Southern Hemi Sunrise

Paul walks across the street and surfs: Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef

Southern Hemi Cut-Back

Northern Hemi Basher

Rat in Ratland - just kidding - Jake ain't no rat - but he IS surfing in Ratland

Don't mess with these guys!!
Lucas and Jake - Wayyyyyy hostile locals - They're both 6'6" tall and play professional rugby!

Northern Hemi Sunset

21 Jan 2006
WHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW - waves, sunrises, sunsets, great job, great friends, great family - it's pretty darn cool to be me!

It's Action Sports Retailer [ASR] time in San Diego, and some of the ASR Surf Stars surfed in The Arena yesterday.

Now, I ain't a got a lot of love for Boogers, but come on Surf Stars, they are OUR Boogers -

I wouldn't go to your surf spots and run over YOUR Boogers, so please take it easy on ours!
ASR Surf Star Drops In

ASR Star executes a nice turn for Booger Avoidance  
ASR Star reconsiders his avoidance tactics, aims at Booger 
Booger displays some sort of new technique [skewer me, but please don't hit my Booger Board]

Booger continues to wave his board to the great Booger God - WHY - or is it Y - or maybe it's Tom Morey??
Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef was still good, even an unemployed hockey player got tubed!

Friday afternoon still was loading-up at Fish Poker Reef!


Sunrise La Jolla Shores 21 Jan 2006

Sunrise La Jolla Shores 21 Jan 2006

Sunset in The Arena 21 Jan 2006

Arena Sunset 21 Jan 2006

19 Jan 2006

Today was replete - at least for me - with exercising my surfing abilities, a tree planting exercise, a hiding from hostile locals exercise, and I was able to check-out some Bird Rock drama!

Plus, tomorrow is the BIG night for El Jeffe and Finglas - I'll be there - Secret Location...

I promise I'll behave as if I were a responsible adult - I be practicing tonight!


18 Jan 2006

Sunrise - Genesee and I-5, La Jolla, CA

Emery and Patrick at Lumpy's Reef, La Jolla, CA

As always, another terrible day of dismal sunrises, lousy waves, hostile locals, polluted water, and fog shrouded sunsets in La Jolla, CA

For the life of me, I cannot figger-out why ANYONE in their right mind would want to live anywhere in SoCal, and most notably, in Barrio LJ!


Arena sunset 18 Jan 2006

17 Jan 2006

17 Jan 2006 - Jake in The Arena

17 Jan 2006 - Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef
Well - I've finally found IT!!

No, not Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef - I first surfed that reef about 50 years ago -

And no - not some sort of Gestalt Therapy - or some Eastern Religion / Western Thought - or ...

I simply found a group of surfers with whom I have a lot in common -

I figgered it out yesterday evening at is a dork Reef -

The local groms were surfing there - Hunter, Matty, Jake, Lucas, and a couple more groms - [their combined age, maybe, as old as I am]

Anyway, they were hooting and exhorting each other into some pretty darn good waves -

When I make the same exhortation attempts among the more adult surfers, especially at The Shores, I get the who is this whacko?? look.

Maybe, just maybe, the reason the groms - who have been seriously surfing for less than 5 years - are already BETTER surfers than most more mature surfers - with perhaps 20 years of surfing experience - is because the groms are STOKED!!

They push each other to get better - the better their peer group surfs, the better each member of the group will surf [at least in my opinion]

Maybe I am a way old guy - in years - but I gotta think my stoke - for surfing AND life in general - rivals any of groms at is a dork Reef, and surely exceeds at least 80% of men my age [at least in my opinion]


17 Jan 2006 - Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef

16 Jan 2006
The water's polluted and the locals are hostile - go home - stay home
Yet ANOTHER, fog shrouded sunset in The Arena 16 Jan 2006

As usual, The Arena offers only mushy crappy waves, dominated by hostile locals, or Henry Hunte!   16 Jan 2006

Even the whales are blow-hards in The Arena! 16 Jan 2006


15 Jan 2006

Arena Sunset


What a day - WHEW - I got to hang around an early morning campfire   -   hang around with middle son Eric, Eric's bride, Steph, oldest son Brian, and my granddaughter, Paige, and their way cool crowd, for Steph's birthday party    -   share good waves [given the windy conditions] with just one other surfer   -  and just to top it off, THE hotties of the Neptune's Corner Gang allowed me to get within 100 yards of their turf.

LJ Shores Sunrise

Sunrise to Sunset - lots of STUFF in between - mostly about how good it is to be ME!

14 Jan 2006

Another lousy sunset, view from my front porch, La Jolla CA
View from Mi Casa, NOT Su Casa - 14 Jan 2006 - La Jolla, CA

Mickey, pulling in - Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef -

BA - you make it look so easy!!
BA pulling in - British Columbia Reef, Honduras, Central America
Photo by: Jim I swear, I won't let the drunk babe wander off Comstock

Not a bad day - and I'm sure you're asking: "Why??"

Besides the good surf, and besides the fact that I shredded, tore, and lacerated the waves, the big reason why I had such a good day:

Today was the first day in more than 50 years of surfing La Jolla Shaws that the HOSTILE LOCALS did not pick on me!!

Was Neil Young EVER hostile??


13 Jan 2006

13 Jan 2006 Sunrise - East side of Mt. Soledad, La Jolla, CA

13 Jan 2006 - Hunter, pulling in at Tommy Wolfe is a dork Reef

11 Jan 2006

Just ANOTHER lousy, fog shrouded, sunset in The Arena

Just ANOTHER great, going away party, for Terry Goldsmith


10 Jan 2006 - Arena Action


09 Jan 2006 - JALGs -

A couple of months ago, my oldest son, Brian, and his wife Jen, had a baby girl -

- As a result -

I guess I became a bit too sentimental, and displayed my feminine side a bit too boldly -

In fact, one of my surf friends called my a p***y, 'cause of my apparent change of attitude -

Well, say good-bye, once again to the nice BA, and hello, once again to the not so nice BA -

In fact, over the Christmas - yeah Christmas, not Holiday - break, I think I put on some of my better performances - [naturally, not surfing performances, other types of performances]

I got this message yesterday:
"Hey BA - we heard all about you - screaming at your surfing bros from Black's to Big Rock!

What happened - didn't Santa give you a membership to the Hair Club for Men - or maybe he put the wrong type of Sex Wax in your stocking?

We thought beachside, or in the water, intimidation was highly illegal in your part of the civilized world!"
First of all, I ain't got NO surfing bros - except my brother Bobby.

Secondly, I've had it up to HERE with JALGs [Just Another Leashed Goon] in the water -

When I started surfing -
"Oh dear god, we've heard this a hundred times, 'the ocean back then was fresh water, it snowed almost every day at The Shores in the winter, the surfboards weighed 150 pounds, no leashes, no wetsuits, blah blah blah,' when is he gonna stop torturing us with 50 year old stories?"
- it seemed that all beginning surfers were called kooks - I guess that in my mind it was almost a cool thing - kindda like being an apprentice.

I won't even sully the word KOOK by the actions of beginning surfers who just don't seem to get it -
In my opinion, the goal for anyone, in any activity, should be to get better and better - incrementally perhaps - but always striving for improvement.
- for example:
When did it become OK to paddle-out right thru the middle of the line-up, regardless of wave size and crowd count?

When did it become OK to go surfing and NOT know how to swim [in]?

When did it become OK to sit right in the middle of the take-off zone, and clog that area?

When did it become OK NOT to know how to kick out / exit a wave WITHOUT jumping off one's board?

When did it happen that the "Unwritten Rules" of surfing were written and published literally everywhere, and they are still called the "Unwritten Rules?"
- OUCH -

Way too much thinking on my part, and in my opinion, way too little thinking by the Leashed Masses.

In fact -

How about a new religion - The Church of the Steroidal Surf Leash - and a daily prayer session where the Great Leash God offers Leashed Mass:
"I pray my leash won't break when I'm surfing

I pray that someone will rescue me WHEN my leash breaks - after all it's just a matter of time until it does, 'cause jumping-off my board is my only wave exit strategy

I actually hope someone will get so mad at me and my drop-ins that they will yell at me - I've got the Great Leash God and a great attorney on my side

I'm off to paddle-out thru the break [any break] and hack as many people as I can - so help me Great Leash God"
By the way - I wear a leash, and I'm glad, for my use, that they exist - for the rest of you who depend completely on your leash as your ONLY method of surfing [and I use the term loosely] safely - don't count on me to rescue you when your cord breaks - actually, I like to help you sever that cord!

Whew - the Never Ending Story


08 Jan 2006
Another BA BIG Adventure!!

The state of Nevada and Pres Bush have conspired!

They have created an interesting conundrum -

They've created a global warming problem that is destroying the equatorial ice caps - however - because of this global warming, the unexpected result has been to create great waves in places never really known for good waves -

The Eastern Shore of Lake Tahoe!

Some surf stars need a photog pro to snap a few photos of the newly created surf spot - BOILS - [thank god for the melting equatorial ice caps] in Lake Tahoe - I went, I photo-ed, they conquered:

Don't waste your time - this was once in a lifetime opportunity!

Mary - Way Outside Reef at Boils, East Shore, Lake Tahoe, NV

Max - Outside Lineup at Boils, East Shore, Lake Tahoe, NV

Emery - Inside Boils, East Shore, Lake Tahoe, NV

Leandro, Way Inside Boils, East Shore, Lake Tahoe, NV

Maybe Hemmingway?  Sunset big game fishing , Boils, East Shore, Lake Tahoe, NV

07 Jan 2006

Bl***'s Photo by OB Root

06 Jan 2006

Ron Stoner's Point - Leslie Pottsville, PA

Another crappy sunset - Wave Loch, Land's End, Scotland

05 Jan 2006

Sunrise La Jolla Shores

Nick at Life's a Beach, New Jersey

Tad at Tad-Poles, Border City, Poland

Sunset in The Arena

04 Jan 2006

6:00 AM - Sunrise at Inside Princess Street, La Jolla CA

A brave surfrider makes the FIRST attempt in the history of surfing to tackle The Reef at Outside Princess Street, La Jolla CA

6:00 PM - Sunset at Outside Princess Street, La Jolla CA

03 Jan 2006

Fire Coral Reef, Typhoon Lagoon, Orlando, Florida

I gotta admit - the southern babes, all running around The Lagoon were way hot ... So hot that I tried to ignore the cute blond when she gave me the "get outta here" signal!

Apparently one of the hotties is gonna get married - and there was something about "snakes" written across her chest - hmmm - snakes, chest, married, board - sounds kindda Freudian to me - Yo Bride to be Babe: Dr. BA's Bird Rock Office [with an ocean view] is open!

There was even an injured one - easy pickings for BA??

Naw - no such luck - even with a broken toe, she easily outran me!



02 Jan 2006
Surf Spy / Spy in the Surf - caught in the act!
Who is this guy??

01 Jan 2006

Emo - Santee Lakes, Santee, CA

This year began just like the past 50 or so that I've been surfing in the ghetto known as La Jolla Shores:
The sunrise was fog shrouded
The waves sucked

The locals were extremely hostile
The water was polluted -
And, to add further insult to injury:
Some guy from some where successfully demonstrated that size does matter [his photos to follow]

Photo by Darcy M

07 Nov 2005 Photo of BA taken by John Slavin

No it ain't Greenough at Sand Spit! It's BA!!
04 November 2005 Photo of BA taken by John Slavin

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